Eff the F**k off Mercury Retrograde

For starters, you can see if Mercury is Retrograde at the moment HERE.

I’m sure y’all have heard of Mercury Retrograde by now, but many of us are still not consciously aware of its impact on our lives.

As San Francisco astrologist Larry Schwimmer best puts it, “Astrology is based on a simple understanding that all the planets in the sky exert their own unique influence on each of us, and the world we live in.” Mercury is known to screw up commerce, communication, technology, travel, and decision making. So basically all the important stuff.

Now, don’t get your panties in a twist.

It can be a great time to set goals, figure out the ways to achieve them, and work your ass off to get there. Our psychic abilities are also heightened at this time so if you are feeling lost about your purpose or direction in your life, it’s a great time for asking for signs and guidance through card readings, dreams, visions, or messages.

Everyone is psychic, you just have to learn how to pay attention to that sixth sense and, like everything else, this takes practice to perfect. You know that gut feeling that you get when you know something bad is going to happen? That’s your intuition or the “all-knowing” part of yourself trying to help guide you on the right path-But don’t worry if you don’t know what the hell I’m talking about, I’ll do a much more in-depth post about channeling your intuition soon.

Without further ado, here’s my personal guide on how to not fall into the hopeless pit of sad-laziness that occurs if and when everything you do goes wrong.

  • Manifest – Figure out exactly what you desire and use not only your time and energy to work towards it, but to meditate on the feeling/energy of what it’s like to already have whatever it is you want. The Law of Attraction states that whatever energy you put out into the universe, you will get back, so be specific.
  • Pay Attention – There are always patterns, signs, and synchronicities around you to lead you in the right direction or remind you that you’re in the right place at the right time, doing exactly what you need to do to succeed. Do you always notice you look at the clock at a certain time? Every number has a different meaning. Notice what songs get stuck in your head and look up the lyrics. There’s no such thing as coincidence. If you can’t see them, ask for clarity. The more you notice these messages, the more you’ll get.
  • Be Patient – Assume that your printer’s gonna stop working the moment you need it, arrive at the airport even earlier than suggested, bring a backup phone charger with you, Keep Triple-A on speed dial.  I cannot stress this enough, especially when it comes to travel, transportation, and technology, things are going to go wrong-plan accordingly.
  • Avoid Making Big Decisions – If at all possible, avoid making any long-term decisions. Communication can be easily misinterpreted during this time and can lead to strains on your relationships with lovers, friends, and family. Try your best to be kind and direct in your communication. Be thoughtful and understanding in your romantic relationships. Don’t sign any contracts or make any new commitments if you can help it.
  • Be Empathetic & Humble – We’re all in this together-take comfort in that. Instead of trying to blame or take your frustration out on others, try to laugh about it together. Nothing puts someone back in their lane like Retrograde.

I know for those of you that are already familiar with Mercury’s influence in our lives, you may be panicking, but you really shouldn’t worry too much because once Mercury Retrograde ends, your life will go from a turd shittily spray-painted gold to THE Shit. Plus what’s the use in worrying about something that you have no control over.

Think of the next 3 weeks as a needed transitional period, you have to let everything fall apart so you can create more. At the end of Mercury Retrograde, the wonderful things that you’ve been manifesting will come to fruition and everything will effortlessly fall back into place, I promise.

Good Luck my loves!

ya girl,


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